"The Midnight Library" by Matt Haig (2020)

 

I remember when I was but a little boy my father asking me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I remember looking him in the eye and saying with absolute conviction, "I want to be an astronaut." In retrospect, naivety mixed with a buttload of space cartoons was doing the answering for me back then. But putting all of that aside, my words were true and honest, and I believed them.

But then... life happened.

And I found myself dragging my ass through medical school, switching to architectural school right to majoring in English. And here I am, the sum of all my past experiences and disappointments and even achievements, a modest high school teacher.

The Midnight Library tells the story of Nora, a fixer-upper low-achiever. After many regrets during the course of her life, from abandoning pursuing swimming professionally, quitting the band, not venturing into Australia along with her friend, not committing to a serious relationship, getting fired, right to blaming herself for her cat's death, Nora decided that life wasn't worth living.

Nora was so real and relatable to me that made the reading experience extremely painful. I don't usually get emotional, but I understand where she's coming from. I bet we all have been there. Disappointment after a disappointment after a disappointment... until depression becomes your shadow trailing you everywhere, even in your sleep. 

Luckily, The Midnight Library isn't about falling into the pit of despair, not about rising out of it like a phoenix, but rather about understanding why one descends into depression in the first place. It's about the struggle between what we are and what we might become, about one's potentiality, their abilities and interests, and how they could redirect them in a way that may bring happiness and meaning to their lives. It's a self-help book in disguise as a well-written story. It doesn't offer a magic recipe for overcoming failure, but it guides you towards whatever end you desire in life. 

I appreciate the short chapters and their witty, remarkable titles and Matt's light-hearted humor. His words are charged with emotion and filled with objective wisdom. He made me sad and laugh. He made me tearful and thoughtful.

Summary:

The Midnight Library is a sci-fi/fantasy story about regrets, lost and wasted opportunities, and crushed hopes. The reading experience is therapeutic and rewarding. It's Square Enix's Life is Strange (the first installment) meeting Blake Crouch's Dark Matter... or at least, the vibe of them. 

I'd recommend this book for those who have lost their way in life, for those who can't see beyond today, for those who are in desperate need of love and connection.